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female
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anonymous
writes: hi , I am having my first indepth sexual talk with my eleven year old daughter ,how explicit can i be ? I explained her about the birds and the bees already Reply to this Question
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female
reader, sweetdreams +, writes (10 August 2006):
 I ordered my daughter a book from American Girl and she's nine and it was wonderful it teaches everything in a appropriate form. What we did was read a chapter every night together and at the end of each chapter I asked her if there was any questions. Some of the topics you had to explain a little bit further in your own words. I would use correct terms not homemade names to make it easier to talk about the body. My daughter speak freely about their bodies with proper knowledge where when I talk I feel uncomfortable because I was not taught the proper names for my body. You could also ask you school councelor for any advice.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2006): I've got an 11 year old son, and sometimes i think he knows more than i do!!!
I have always waited for my son to ask first, which he has done since young, the first time was as a toddler when we used to take baths together, he was fascinated as to why our bits were different. So i explained matter of factly without embarrasment. These kinds of opportunities readily present themselves cos kids are naturally curious. Its only adults that get embarrassed, and we teach our kids to get embarrassed by doing that! Please dont say 'birds & bees'!! Just call it what it is, sex! Kids appreciate direct honest truth in a matter of fact way! If my son asks anything that i feel is inappropriate for his age i tend to give him an answer, but one that is perhaps not so graphic! The other day he asked me what a blowjob was, and i just said its another way of having sex in a loving relationship. Kids feel valued and appreciated when they are given proper answers to thier questions. As long as you stipulate that sex is best when it occurs in a loving relationship. Instead of forcing a sit down chat just let her know you are there for her to listen and answer any questions she has, or for any worries or fears. If you foster an open loving relationship with lots of communication she will readily come to you for answers. Let her guide you into what she wants to know.
Good luck x
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2006): If you daughter wants to know all the facts then explain to her some of the main points of sexual life. Tell her the technical terms of the different points of sexual life and explain each part and its function on the way. Try to be delicate and go slowly as you daughter will have a lot of questions. http://www.factsoflife.org.uk/html/sex/sex.htmHope this helps
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