A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My son is 4 years old and he is very hard to handle, he doesnt listen at all and fights with his sister all of the time. My husband is a stay at home Dad but he yells all of the time. It is nerve racking for me. It is not very effective with my son. Please help me find a better solution to this problem. Reply to this Question
Share |
Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, abbeymom  +, writes (29 August 2008):
 Hi there! First off dad needs to stop the yelling. Men don't always have the same patience women do when dealing with kids. Your son is only acting and reacting the way he's been taught. Dad yells so I will not listen and I will fight too.
Fighting with his sister, not listening and all the other things he might be doing is I agree with the previous poster attention seeking, but not to displease.
Kids learn early to push our buttons. Cause and affect. If I do this and touch the lamp dad shouts and gets up and deals with me. Mmmmm note to self I know how to make dad mad.
They don't mean to but kids are smart and mostly they just crave the attention and even negative attention is still attention.
Take some time with your son. One thing I did with each of my kids is make a date time when I wasn't working or had an hour or two. I would take each one out of the house, leaving dad with the other to bond on his own one on one with them.
We'd go for walks, get an ice cream, see a movie. The kids looked forward to their time not only with me but dad as well who is also stay at home. It really helped to ease the tension.
~ Abbeymom
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2007): Your son is attention seeking, try one to one without the yelling, he is looking for guidance and understanding of how to do thngs right. If he is constantly getting shouted at, they learn fast as you no doubt know...May be you are the one at work, try taking a couple of days off ,and send your stroppy impatient husband on a fishing trip, or tell him to go grow some veg elsewhere... get them out of each others face and see the differance, as a mum as hard as things are...it will be worth it and may be you will see where the issue lies. Theres no way at the age of four, he wishes to displease, he is just reacting the way he is reacted too. should it be a long term arrangement, that the dad remains at home, taking good care of the children, send him to parenting classes, give your kids a break.
...............................
|