A
female
age
26-29,
*baby
writes:My son is 32 months and we are trying to potty train him, but he refuses and says "no potty mommy". His dad and I got separated less than a year ago and have joint custody. He goes 1 and 2 at school and at his dad's house, but not with me! I feel I have done things all wrong especially getting frustrated and getting mad at him after several diaper changes of him not letting me know he had to go. I have bought the same potty that his dad got, I have bought a "big boy toy" as a reward that is collecting dust, and even watching his favorite show while on the pot has not worked. I am clearly doing something wrong. Should I just back off and let him get comfortable with me again or keep at it with a lot more patience? Reply to this Question
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reader, Gbaby +, writes (20 July 2007):
Gbaby is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for the help and advice. I was finally able to get him on the potty this last week! I am so proud of him. I was also relieved to know that I was not doing such a bad job after all. How I did it; I let him roam free meaning no underwear or pull up. I let him be naked to make sure he felt everything about to happen and he caught on after a few accidents. I am taking things slow; so as soon as he gets home from school I take off his clothes from the bottom down and he tells me he has to go. The next step is to be able to wear underwear and have him let me know before he goes. He is very smart and as soon as he realized I was going to wait patiently he gave me the joy of success! Thank you again for the advice it helped very much to know I was not a total tart.
Gbaby.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2007): Hi there bbes,
You have tried everything just be patint with him babes, take the potty to your toilet and when you need to go tell him to try with you play a game and ask him whose tinkle can last the longest when you having a wee, laugh about it if he does go then reward him straight away...Give it time and he will eventually go
Good luck babes
Love Donna xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2007): It is hard knowing what to do for the best with your child in these situations, it is not that he dont know what to do so you are gonna have to approach it diferently maybe you could take him to the toilet with you and if he dont go but you do then you get a reward like a sweet or something but he dont . If he wants one the same as you he must sit on the toilet and do one then he can get rewarded it is gonna take time but kids are cleverer than we all realise and it sounds like he is playing you at the moment if he is going at school and his dads but not with you. but you must remmber he has had a big change in his life with his dad moving out and i think this is his way of saying how hurt he is . you are not doing anything wrong so dont worry yourself about it if he doesnt start going to the toilet then he will eventually anyway because its not nice having a wet or dirty diaper on . And dont let him know that it gets to you because he will do it all the more.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Haly +, writes (8 July 2007):
I know you posted this a while ago and you problem may be solved by now but i am going to answer anyway. First of all i know how hard and fustrating this problem can be and i know it is hard to keep your cool and not loose it at times, try not to shout but tell him in a calm voice that you are dissapointed and you thought that he was a big boy and could use the potty, but nevermind and that he is to try again the next time, reward him with a sticker chart, kandoo have a webiste http://www.kidskandoo.com/en_US/home.do that has some great advice and songs to encourage children to use the loo, maybe it would help if you bought him a stool and let him just use the toilet, i missed the potty stage out after numerous failed attempts and opted for a stool, i bought some special books for reading whilst on the toilet, my sons favourite, although gross, is The little mole who knew it was none of his buisness, its about a mole who wakes up one day to find someone has poo'd on his head and he goes on a mission to find out who done it, it fasinates my son and it was the only thing that worked in getting him to do a poo, and you know what i don't care about how gross it is, because it worked and thats the key thing.
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2007): From personal experiences with two children i would say leave him till he is ready and he will be in time.
I pushed my son all the time to try and use the potty and he use to refuse and it took me ages to get him to go on it, and if i remember correctly he did not use the potty in the end he went straight to the toilet.
When my daughter came along i just left her to it i showed her where the potty was put her on it a couple of times and i do think sometimes because i did not push her thats why she was trained more quickly.
I think we have to remember none of us like being pushed into something.
Take care.xx.
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